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Goodnight Artemis Fowl
Goodnight Artemis Fowl
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hello this is dog. (post limit blog is slutty-vladimir-tod. i track the tag "oyasumiartykun", asks tagged "sabra's asks", queue'd posts tagged "artemis fowl an queue", and also, for rent fund til the first, please comission me!)

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Artemis Fowl RP with Cyberphuk. Block “and and then” if uninterested!
Artemis Fowl RP with Cyberphuk. Block “and and then” if uninterested!



The struggle is real.

does this really deserve 31k notes



one time i took a picture of a tiger at the zoo and the tiger smiled for the picture it was very great and the best picture i’ve ever taken







I see your shifting gaze, that disgusted glance. I know you’re questioning my parenting from across the elementary school assembly.

Let me tell you a little story about the kindergarten student with bright purple hair, my little Raven Marie…

A month before school started she decided to play hair stylist with the craft scissors, and to save what was left I had to opt for a pixie cut. She was absolutely devastated. It was about three hours before she stopped her harsh sobbing and hiccups.


She has thought that the length of a girls hair was what made her “girly”. I know I’ve personally had many hairstyles around her before, including a purple mohawk, which many people criticized as not being “girly” enough. Media, other children, other parents, and society made it worse. She would randomly burst in tears while out in public for the first week of her new style, screaming that she looked like a boy. That everyone would think she’s a boy.

At one point she took off her bow in her hair, threw it at a cashier and screamed, “I DON’T NEED THIS BOW TO TELL YOU THAT I’M NOT A BOY, BECAUSE I’M NOT”

Proudly stomping away in her blue jean overalls, head held high.

Once we edged closer to the first day of school she kept asking questions like, “Do you think the other kids will like me? Do you think they’ll be my friend? Will they think I’m a boy? Will they pick on me because I have boy hair?”

So I went to the grocery store, bought some dye, and spent the whole night transforming my bright blonde little girl into a plum punk rock fairy. I then assured her that if any of the kids didn’t like her, they were just jealous.

As for you, mothers and teachers with the wandering eyes filled with disgust and judgement, I’m in the business of raising a free spirit.

Here’s to you, Raven Marie. I love you.


You might think you are so radical and oh such a great parent for teaching your kid to be a nonconformist but all you are doing is limiting your child’s potential and brainwashing it.

Take it from an educator : kids need conformity, they need to fit in, they need to belong. Why do you think some get bullied and others don’t? At a young age our minds work on a semi primitive level. The group keeps us safe, are friends are those who are like us, we are different because our group is different. Those that stand out get bullied, get cast aside. You are setting up your kid to be judged and ridiculed.

Furthermore you teach her liberalism, feminism and other political non sense that matters to you but has no business polluting a child’s mind. Kids MUST discover things themselves, you as a parent have the OBLIGATION to take care of your kid and that includes giving them COMPLETE FREEDOM OF CHOICE. If your girl wants to fit in, to have long locks and be a house wife one day then you let her do that.

You DO NOT preach feminism to a kindergarten kid. You DO NOT push your agenda on an impressionable mind. You DO NOT set up your kid to be the school’s freak.

In other words, you are a bully to your own child. You are unfit to have a kid simply because you fail to understand basic human behavior. You know close to nothing about a child’s education and frankly the one that needs to go back to kindergarten is you.

they said it so well up there… kids will grow up and have their own time to have these phases and it will be by their own choice (like it or not of course lol) I’ve seen it first hand many times what happens when a child doesn’t fit in… like once there was this little boy who was always dressed in really weird hipster clothes (like a little suit and even a red bow) and it was hell for him. and of course it was my fault I didnt stop all the bullying but it’s not all my fault… it has to start from home. and I know its unfair but the world,the society is not fair. there is something what majority calls normal depending on country and culture and you need to just take it for the sake of your child… like said there will be day and time they can do whatever they want.




You dyed her hair.

You dyed a little kid’s hair. 

With paint containing dangerous chemicals that can cause cancer.

A little fucking kid. 

Are you fucking insane?! 

There’s been fucking research that links an increased risk of cancer to dying a child’s hair at too early of an age. 

What the fuck is wrong with you. 

Dude it’s not like she knew the chemicals are that bad, little kids, a lot of little kids, get their hair dyed all the time. Most of the kids in my school did, and I did. She didn’t know. As for “never not conform as a child, teaching her feminism, etc” what the fuck. Who cares oh my god. Literally all that happened was a little girl thought she was gonna get picked on for having short hair, so the mom lifted her spirits. It’s not ~~~feminism~~~ and who gives a FUCK about “don’t go outside the norms”, fucking children will pick on anything. Literally ANYTHING. Not just the kids who stand out, but the kids who are weaker, less likely to speak up, etc, even if they’re the EXACT same as their counterparts in every other way.


a little love story about mermaids and tattoos



Screw art!



Performance, tumblr text post on screen, 2014

efka-zoi said: Hi there. So as a fellow Spiro fan and someone who also rates the third book as their favourite I'm surprised at how widespread the whole paedophile!Spiro reading is. I can certainly see why people might interpret him that way (I've written it a few times) but it's surprising to me how many people seem to get that just from canon. Can I ask what in canon gave you that impression?








Well, me and Cyberphuk were thinking about it, and

1) He treats Artemis, the 13 year old, as both a child, and an adult. Which gives off this strange, creepy vibe.

2) It’s implied he watched Artemis in the shower, or at least saw him naked, page 196 on the pdf I have. Although it’s sort of justified, it’s still…yeah.

3) He gets what he wants regardless of morals. He has none. He has no qualms stealing from Artemis, kidnapping him, or just generally lording over this minor.

4) Old white American man with money, duh (okay that’s a joke).

(So it shows up in your notifications: efka-zoi)

yes,yes, all of this yes!
thank you for putting it into the words that i couldn’t. this is it exactly.

also its been a long while since iv’e read it, but doesn’t he get kinda touchy at points too? i honestly cant remember but i think he does at least once or twice hold artemis by the shoulders. unless im just imagining it


I really wanna read pedo!Spiro stories now ;_;

Oh yeah, he is very physical with Artemis, that’s another point. But again, I feel it’s more about asserting dominance by invading personal space than a specifically sexual action.

I really need to get off my ass and finish my Spiro fic.

Admittedly, I SERIOUSLY doubt it’s canon. Like, implied, maybe, but I doubt Eoin, even if this was a higher level in terms of young adult fiction, would flat out make him a pedo.

But I want to make this absolutely fanon. I just really want that.

it did feel implied to me,reading it again as an older person and  really thinking about spiros actions toward artemis. a lot of it did come off as power play, and it made me extremely uncomfortable, in a way that just screamed ” if this were an adult book spiro would probably be a sexual predator”. spiro was all about power and dominace and being better than those he considered beneath him (which he considered artemis, a child,to be) and he seemed like he would us sexual advances to get power, if he could get away with it

I check the AF tag after ages and this is what I see. I’m so proud of you all.  Anyways Spiro always made me uncomfortable, and I just recalled  some quotes as to why so I dug out my Eternity Code and here they are:

"Blunt patted Artemis on the head. ‘I don’t know what happened in that London restaurant, but you try anything like that here, and I will turn you inside out and eat your organs.’ He gnashed his pointy teeth to make the point and leaned close, whispering into Artemis’s ear. Artemis could hear the teeth click with every syllable."

Yeah that’s gross. And not only did he spy on Artemis in the shower, the robe he gave him had Spiro’s initials on it, “reminding him of his presence”

Sprio is the best villian